Monday, April 12, 2010

Top 5 Oddball Wedding Covers

Hey, welcome back to The Vault's overview of weddings in comics. I would have posted this sooner, except I was at a wedding. See how that works? But with the revelry safely behind me, I'm free now to take a look at today's topic: the Top 5 Oddball Wedding Covers.

Now, before we reveal the list, I want to say that one of the great things about the word "top" is that it's really vague. I'm not claiming that these are the best oddball wedding covers, I'm just saying they are the "top" oddball wedding covers. You know what that means: these are just the ones I know about. Given the nature of wedding covers in comics history, I'm sure there are dozens of truly bizarre horror covers and romance covers in particular. Many of those are probably far weirder than the five I have picked, but for whatever reason, these are the five that have stood out for me.

So here's a challenge for you, my interactive readers: if you have any favorite wedding covers that haven't made my list (or tomorrow's list of the Top 5 Superhero Weddings) let me know about it and if there are enough cool covers I'll do a follow-up feature on reader submissions.

Otherwise, stop complaining and read on.

5. Jonah Hex #47

I'd like to give a shoutout to honorable mention Groo the Wanderer #42, which almost made the cut but got bumped by one of my personal favorites, the wedding of Jonah Hex. This choice was influenced by the fact that this issue kicked off a typically out there Hex storyline that eventually saw the bounty hunter head to China to rescue his immigrant bride from kidnapping warlords who wanted to force him to assassinate the Emperor. Why the hell not.

4. Rip Hunter, Time Master #24

This is what happens when you time travel: you mess up history. Case in point? This cover, which shows the Virgin Queen, Elizabeth, deciding to destroy all of history by marrying Rip Hunter, Time Master. Suck on that, Earl of Leicester!

3. Amazing Spider-man #131

An entire generation of young comic readers are still traumatized nearly four decades later by the image of Aunt May tying the knot with Doctor Octopus. Don't even think about the honeymoon. Agh, get the brain bleach! And the eye bleach! Why, Gerry Conway, why?!

2. Wonder Woman #155

Despite the fact that Wonder Woman is about to marry a disgusting alien monstrosity, I still find this easier to look at than the whole Aunt May / Doc Ock thing. Seriously, ugh. Bonus points, though, for having alternate timeline versions of herself, including Wonder Tot, as part of her own wedding party.

1. Jimmy Olsen #98

What else could number one possibly be except Jimmy Olsen #98, which not only sees Jimmy getting hitched to a female gorilla, but also sees the always politically correct Superman dressed up as a "witch doctor" and performing the ceremony using black magic. Score one for the 1950's (and make sure you click on this one to look at the larger version).

Tomorrow (or whenever):
The Top 5 Superhero Weddings!

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